A Little Loving Spoonful...

 NIPENDE KWA NIA NIPATE KUTULIA--- LOVE ME SO THAT I CAN RELAX

Yeah so, when I think about the reason that folks get all hyped about Valentines Day, I snicker to myself. I guess in it's essence the sentiments are well meant and coming from a good place. I just don't get the commercialization of it and how 'we' get sucked into it. You know its a commercially hyped-up holiday, you know that you don't really want to go out buy all the stuff associated with it but you do anyway, and you know that it is fleeting thing. What you know and what you do are becoming so distant, with the holiday stuff(i.e. Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween). So why do we do it?

Simple: We love the idea of love and all it's syrupy sweet sentiments. No judgment here, not from this Libra. Love me baby! I am however, a big supporter of recreating these days to fit my/our aesthetic. I believe we should Africanize every thing we participate in. So for many, many years, I have supported Black Love Day. The 13th and the 15th!!  It was initially my rebellion of the ideals associated with Valentine's Day, but then I wanted to discard the idea of one day to show your love to your love. I mean Black Love in everything, everyday. Sometimes its a struggle to give, receive and share this concept, nevertheless I try. I promote Black Love, there are several couples who I think exemplify it very well. I am glad to see that there is more of it all around.

Just wanted to share a few things about love,

Khalil Gibran spoke of love:

"Love is  the only flower that grows and blossoms without the aid of seasons."

"Love is the only freedom in the  world because it so elevates the spirit that the laws of humanity and the phenomena of nature do not alter its course."

"Love lies in the soul alone,
 Not in the body, and like wine
Should stimulate our better self
To welcome gifts of Love Divine."

Marianne Williamson in Illuminata gave a prayer to attract great love in your life:

Dear God,
 
I feel an empty space within me, a place where I would so love to love.
I know that if my beloved came here, I would adore and cherish, honor and serve him.
Please give me the opportunity to expand my heart into the life of another in the holiest way, the most beautiful way, the most intimate way, if that serves your purpose.
For I would learn the secret of love and use what I learn to grace the life of another.
What a marvelous possibility, Lord, that such a treasure would be placed in my hands.
Please do this.
I will try my best.
Amen

Paulo Coelho has a note on love:

 Love Is Only A Word

Life is too short for us to keep important words, for example, 'I love you', locked in our hearts.
But do not always expect to hear the same words back. We love because we need to love.
Otherwise, love loses all meaning and the sun ceases to shine.

A rose dreams of enjoying the company of bees, but none appears. The sun asks: 'Aren't you tired of waiting?'
'Yes,' answers the rose, 'but if I close my petals, I will wither and die.'
And even yet, even when Love does not appear, we remain open to its presence. Sometimes, when loneliness seems about to crush everything, the only way to resist is to keep on loving.

Our one true choice is to plunge into the mystery of that uncontrollable force.
Then we discover, when we go home, that someone was there waiting for us, looking for the same thing we were looking for and experiencing the same anxieties and longings.
 
Because love is like water that is transformed into a cloud: it's lifted up into the heavens, where it can see everything from a distance, aware that, one day, it will have to return to earth. 

Because love is like the cloud that is transformed into rain: it is drawn down to the earth, where it waters the fields.

Love is only a word, until we decide to let it possess us with all its force.
Love is only a word, until someone arrives to give it meaning.
Don't give up. Remember, it's always the last key ring that opens the door.

Iyanla Van Zandt on Love:

How do you know when you are really in love? First of all, you would not have to ask the question. Love is knowing, it is not a condition or state of mind. When you are loving, you are not doubting, judging or fearing; you are in a state of acceptance. You accept yourself first, for who and what you are, and then the person you love, without question. You do  not want to fix him, change him, control him or help him. You want for the person you love exactly what she wants for herself. When you are in love, you  feel vulnerable and know that it is okay. You do not hide your feelings, change them to fix what you think the other person wants, and you do not question what you feel. When you are in love, you give, expecting nothing in return, not even love. Love is an inner process between you and yourself that you want to share with someone, everyone. Love is free. If your quest is to own, control, hold on to, protect, or take care of someone, they cannot be free and you are not in love. Love is never wrong, seldom right.
It just is.                                                                                            

Affirmation: Love is in the midst of me.

Again, Khalil Gibran shares this short on Love:

Yesterday I stood at the temple door interrogating the passers-by about the mystery and merit of Love. And before me passed an old man with an emaciated and melancholy face, who sighed and said: “Love is a natural weakness bestowed upon us by the first man.”

But a virile youth retorted; “Love joins our present with the past and the future.”

Then a woman with tragic face sighed and said: “Love is a deadly poison injected by black vipers, that crawl from the caves of hell. The poison seems fresh as dew and thirsty eagerly drinks it; but after the first intoxication the drink sickens and dies a slow death.”

Then a beautiful, rosy-cheeked damsel smilingly said: “Love is wine served by brides of Dawn which strengthens strong souls and enables them to ascend to the stars.”

After her a black-robed, bearded man, frowning, said: “Love is the blind ignorance with which youth begins and ends.”

Another, smiling, declared: “Love is a divine knowledge that enables men to see as much as the gods.”

Then a blind man, feeling his way with a cane: “Love is a blinding mist that keeps the soul from discerning the secret of existence, so that the heart sees only trembling phantoms of desire among hills, and hears only echoes of cries from voiceless valleys.”

And a feeble ancient, dragging his feet like two rags, said, in quavering tones: “Love is the rest of the body in quiet of the grave, the tranquility of the soul in the depth of Eternity.”

And a five-year-old child, after him said laughing: “Love is my father and mother, and no one knows Love save my father and mother.”

And so, all who passed spoke of Love as the image of their hopes and frustrations, leaving it a mystery as before.

So as I think about love experienced and unrequited, I realize there are no mistakes to be made in love. Love is a revolutionary act! When you are ready, bring 100% of yourself to it, go for it!

Happy Black Love Day!

Where to Find these words:

The Words of the Master and Broken Wings by Khalil Gibran,  A Second Treasury of Khalil Gibran, 1962.

Acts of Faith by Iyanla van Zandt

Illuminata: A Return to Prayer by Marianne Williamson

Manuscript Found In Accra by Paulo Coelho